I've been fretting over this new blog entry.
Only because I'm not really in a writin' mood lately.
Not a lot has changed excepting my boys are getting older.
I'm getting older. We're all getting older. And the sense
of my own mortality has kind of gripped my psyche and hasn't let go.
(I go through this every Spring. My family members all
have birthdays right after the other and it's a constant
reminder that we're all maturing. Some of us faster than others,
in the case of my adolescent husband. You think I'm being too
hard on him? Great. Then you can come for dinner one night and
witness him both farting and burping without apologies, and
encouraging my boys to clap if he's beat last dinner's record.
Then, we'll see what you have to say. But, I digress.)
We're broke as heck. Worse than before. So, that single wide
budget has shrunk down to about the size of our Subaru. I'm
trying to remain positive. This means, I get to make the
boys' birthday cake this year instead of paying $25 for a bakery
cake that has a a**ton of dyes and artificial mess that make
my boys yak all over the carpet in a array of colors. I like
to bake and my boys like to eat cake. It all works out. We've
spent all our excess "fun" money on small gifts for the boys
and I'm researching on how to make my own party decorations on
the cheap. And, we're doing a "special" dinner at home instead
of dinner out. This means the birthday boy gets to pick out
their birthday dinner.......that I get to figure out how to make on
the cheap. They've all clammored to me with suggestions, and I'm
doing my best to figure out how I can do what they wish on the cheap.
I'm determined to keep a positive attitude. Even if I don't have
a lot to say on the matter.
So, anyway.....pretty soon, it'll be Happy Birthday to Me.
And when I blow out the candles on the cake I make for myself,
I will make sure to thank Whoever for the blessings I've
been given: Each new day I'm presented with to spend time with
the people that matter to me the most. The ability to do the best
for my family I can, no matter what the budget. The ingenuity I
was shown by my parent that you can do anything you set
your mind to. The friendships I've made that get me through
the hardest times. And the state of mind that I can just open
my mouth and tell anyone about it.
So, yes. I'm older. But, I think with each passing year,
I'm more thankful.
How's that for turning a heck of a negative into a shining positive?